Thursday, November 04, 2004
I don't know your name. I don't know you.

Today felt good. Though I'm at home. It felt good. Was supposed to go swimming with stu. He was late, I didn't bother to wait, I went home. Wasn't pissed, just didn't really feel like going out actually. Supposed to meet javin to watch before sunset. Well, he couldn't meet me. That's good, I didn't want to meet anyone either. Wanted to meet jinghui but there's chinese papers tomorrow. That's good, good excuse to stay home. Watched six feet under. And it just started to pour and pour.

Was thinking about how my family function. Pretty cool I guess. Everyone's pretty cool about anything. Wonder when it was okay for anyone of us to say fuck in front of everybody else. Well, deep down I love them all the same.

You know, everything's actually fine. Nothing's really wrong. Yes, there are differences here and there. Maybe people should stop magnifying them. It occurred to me that maybe my way of handling things might be wrong. Because I don't magnify things and analyse what's wrong. I let things be, do what you want to do. I told anqi that, let geok be, give her some space and time. She told me she just can't sit there and wait for her to get the feeling back. I don't know. It's just something very plain but it hit me so hard. Did I do anything wrongly?

Maybe I should start everything anew. It's not impossible. It's just tedious. There are things that I won't do anymore. I know I can, but I just won't. Rainy days, as always.

+mood+ rainy
+listening+ alicia keys ~ if i ain't got you