Tuesday, November 23, 2004
Okay. Let's just let me bitch a lil. This totally irritates me. I don't know why. Just let it go would you? Why are you just so narrow minded. You said it's gonna be same, so just let it be. Why are you torturing yourself you dumbass? Get a grip of yourself and move on.

I guess what happened to me and Huimin (SAJC) really affected the ties I have with the guys in SAJC band. I enjoyed the football match with them totally, but I found myself quite isolated from them. I don't know how much they know what happened between us, but I certainly felt very uncomfortable. I didn't mean to hurt anyone, and yet again, it was my impulsive desires. I must learn how to curb it. How do I get back the feeling I had when I was in SAJC? I miss them terribly, this wonderful bunch of people. I guess the most I have them, is in my memories. Hey, that's good enough for me. I don't want to ask too much, because I'm too afraid to lose that much.

Oh man. I feel guilty I don't know why. Can you stop being so stupid? It gets on my nerves so much. Yes, you are a saint wannabe but you all are still friends, I'm not stopping you right? Oh man, fuck, not that I'm disgusted, I feel so uncomfortable. Everyone knows that he felt uncomfortable that day. What do you want me to do? I'll bring down my boyfriend the next match then. Are you happy now? Not that it totally affects me, I don't want you to be so stupid. Just fucking get a life.

+mood+ where-is-cherk-i-need-to-bitch
+listening+ jimi hendrix ~ voodoo chile